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Tortured night.
Lake effect snow falls sideways
instead of from sky to ground.
People on the road, driving blind.
Outside it is dark and cold.
I remember loving you.
How each morning
felt uncertain
and incomplete,
as if it snowed all night
the night before
and all truths are undone.
What had been turned away
might be offered again.
And the repeated answer
digs a deeper and deeper
pit in the stomach
like ulcer,
burning everything it touches.
No today.
No tomorrow.
No the day after that.
But come back again and try.
I’ll say the same words
in a different tone
and give you something
to hope about.

Love is the knot
that keeps you hanging
at the end of the rope
and cuts the life
out of your hands.
And you hold on
for far too long
because you thought
that’s how love is
supposed to feel:
like acid in the stomach
and frostbitten hands.

“As tears go by”
by photographer Teija Härmäaho


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