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I am not accustomed
to writing in sustained bliss.

It does not feel fair
to you,
you who have been fair
to my heart since the beginning,
you deserve all the lovely lines
I could break apart
with skillful grace
and reconstruct
into the beautiful chaos
that makes up the kind of poems
that walk around in your soul
like recurring dreams.
I who used to bend words
into images of my choosing,
I who used to commune
with language like
trees in the spring rain,
I should be doing more writing
for the one man that
gave me my happy ending.

But see, for the first time,
the potency of the silence
is enough for me.
For the first time,
the blank page does not
feel devoid of meaning.
I’d sit by the window
and the music of
my sheer existence
would fill me
to the tips of my being
and I am content
just to love you,
to believe in you,
in this,
and to be lost
among the pages
of the eloquence and mastery
of One who evolved
all the phrases and metaphors
into the divine transcendence
that brought us here.
.

PhiladelphiaEngagement_RyanEstes
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“Philadelphia Engagement | Amy + Matt”
.
by photographer Ryan Estes

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