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And if you can,
find yourself
that kind of love,
a love that you can do
for a long, long time

a love that can stand
on its own,
hold itself up
needing only you and him
a love that is sustainable

and lets you breathe,
and sleep peacefully at night
and stretch every morning
and grow,
an organic kind of love

one that can make you
cry grateful tears in the hallway
of your office building
with just one phone call
telling you he loves you
in just a slightly
different way from
the way he told you yesterday

find a love that is green
and healthy, because
a daily roller coaster ride
through arguments and
trust issues is bad
for the heart

and BandAid solutions of
expensive presents traded in
for cheap, makeshift peace are,
after all, disproportionate to
the unnecessary stress and pain
the bitter silences
and the mind games
that are not worth it

find something you can build on
not something you have to
spend half of your time
trying to save

find something that will
still fit you
even when you’re old
so find a love that is mature
from the beginning,
and spend a lifetime
perfecting it

because life is hard with
its sharp turns and sharp edges
difficult truths and bad weather
and I imagine marriage
can be an overwhelming thing
so if you’re not always
on the same side,
how do you think you will
face everything else?

“Anna and Eric Chicago Engagement” by photographer Caroline Tran