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His forever chose me
cruises steadfastly across
the ocean of my insecurities
from island to island,
carrying precious cargo
and passengers to whom
beauty is promised

I’ve never been afraid
of forever
I’ve always handled it
the same way I used
lesser words in my sentences

but for the first time
I docked in Paradise and
saw forever’s light scattered
on the waves as they
caressed the hull of the ship
that is determined
not to leave this foreign harbor
without me

a love so true
it made the sky and the sea
after its own image
and the soft sand pliant
to our idle fingers’ touch

he knows I’ll sail
to the ends of the earth with him
and we will build our own
piece of Heaven, boulder by boulder
kiss by kiss,
promise by promise

but there’s a hell that I carry,
that I hide deep inside of me

and it scares me
to bind him to permanence
on my side, because
I’ve hurt so many
in the past,
and it might catch up on us
someday, the side of me that
can’t be taught how to be gentle,
and comes up with creative lies
and the cruelest ways
to treat those
I trust the most
and by that time we might just
be too far out at sea
for him to turn back
and give me up

and if I may be as honest
as this blue,
the thought of walking
this shore alone, with the breeze
the sole witness to my tears
does not even frighten me
as much as anything
I might do to hurt his heart,
I will go through it,
sail off into the sunset
and embrace the forever
that he offers
in hopes that
I might pull it off and
be everything he needs

I’ll give up the sun in my sky
to be everything he needs

untitled photo
by photographer Kristina Фотограф в Мексике


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