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It was when I found out you were all alone in my heart now, there was no
one else there, everybody else has moved away without a word,
one else there, everybody else has moved away without a word, after all the
years of trying to weed them out of the garden of my self-worth, my unchaste
heart, and it’s been years since I grudgingly co-signed the contract saying
they would forever haunt me, clanging chains and showing their faces on
grimy panes of twilight windows, staking claim at their territory,
grimy panes of twilight windows, staking claim at their territory, each segment
of my heart that was impossible to retrieve from each passport stamp of my
past, the intensity of yesterday stretching possessively into tomorrow,
past, the intensity of yesterday stretching possessively into tomorrow, it was
after I learned to live with my persona that had shrunken over time, so crowded,
so heavy, so branded, covered with indelible fingerprints,
so heavy, so branded, covered with indelible fingerprints, it was when I heard
you whistling Tchaikovsky as you papered white new walls and started bringing
in giant, soft new furniture and pushed them around spacious, sunlight-flooded
rooms whose doors opened into more spacious, sunlight-flooded rooms, your
footsteps echoing around the sweet breathing space, so ready to be filled with
memories,
memories, it was when I no longer remembered why I ever felt traumatized, or
old, or used, or deserted, or tired,
old, or used, or deserted, or tired, it was that night.
old, or used, or deserted, or tired, it was that night. And I told you I did not
know why I couldn’t sleep that night, I didn’t know why I clutched at you and
held on as if teetering from the edge of a cliff, I didn’t know why I was saying I
love you like I couldn’t say it enough, but I just couldn’t tell you this.
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floweronfloor
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Photo first found through a Google images search.
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If this image belongs to you, please let me know.
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