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If falling in love only takes
an instant, like when you’re
reveling in the indigo woolen
blanket of good ol’ chemistry
paying attention to their eyes
or their hands and the way
the night seems to
smell mysteriously of strawberries
and they just say something
that somehow,
with the way it was phrased or
the tone of their voice, called
you back to a place where
you last felt vulnerable
and reminded you of all the ways
good and sweet and warm and safe
and beautiful could be found
right in the part of yourself
where you left it
and you looked away
for a split second,
maybe at your wristwatch,
even if time was the last thing
you were wondering about, or
as if a bright orange robin landed
on the windowsill and
caught your eye,
and when you return your gaze
to the person in front of you
or next to you, they have already
transformed in your eyes,
no longer that person you’d seen
doing such common things as
holding a ballpoint pen, or
getting off a car, or
squinting at the afternoon light,
but someone infinitely more real,
recognizing in them
the Turkish-blue soul
framed by a silver lining
descended from the Heaven you’ve
always believed in,

if falling in love was like that,
like driving across
territorial borders as narrow
as state lines,
then no,
I did not fall in love with you.

This is more like the way
Gustav Klimt must have
added red to his blue
minutely, with deliberation and
careful not to do it in excess
so that the violet would seem
to be more a trick on the eye
than anything, at first,
until it became undeniable;
or the way evening falls
as it must,
on a city preoccupied
with its own affairs
unmindful of the inevitable
consequence of daylight
only to look around and find
time had caught up and
run out and the moon had
pulled its entourage of stars.
I don’t remember when
I started loving you,
I only know that I do.
I don’t remember the last night
I went to sleep not equating
with the darkness the ink
I would use to write
all the love letters in the world,
only that I’m writing them for you.
.

candlesandpetals
.
untitled photo from the image bookmarking site, WeHeartIt
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